An Explanation of Sorts

The links on this page are works in progress. . . . read at your own risk (actually currently they are marked ‘private’ until I work through a few identity scenarios to avoid naming the innocent or guilty). Are they true? Are they false? Are they a hard-nosed examination of the past, are they a rose-colored glasses look back in time, or a made up fantasy of what someone wished had really happened?

Once upon a time, I was a professional photographer with a press pass. I had wanted to be a traveler, an artist and a writer for as long as I can remember. I continue to do photography today (though not professionally, which I find unfortunate). From the mid 1980s to mid 1990s I was a professional photographer based in Chicago Illinois. I photographed many events and fundraisers for arts, liberal and left-wing causes, photographed many social and political demonstrations, punk rock shows and art events in the 80s and 90s and also did work for several newspapers and magazines in Chicago and nationally as well as covers or content for a few books. I also shot art portraits, self-portraits, nudes and documentaries for myself, some of which were later used in activist publications or political t-shirts and others of which were shown in art shows and others of which were only seen by friends or classmates.

These are some of the selected slices of my life. Things I remember now, and want to document so that I do not forget them; things that might be interesting to others (for whatever reason); things that I find to be beautiful truths, lies and photographs …

Follies of Youth – Early Age late 60s/70s

Protopunkette – Youth late 70s/80s

Suffragette City – University NYC 1982-83

Learning Curve – Art School mid 80s

Queerness – The 90s

Since the time I started developing my own images, I have found I could not put down my camera for too long (the biggest gap was upon moving to France, finding the prices of film development sky high and having sold off all my darkroom equipment before jumping across the pond – now I have gone digital to solve that problem, though I still miss the beauty of a silver print).

So I continue to shoot for myself, with an eye on a dream that ‘some day’ I will have the guts to get back into photographing for causes and publications and art again and will drop this silly poser sham of being a computer geek. I have managed as a computer geek to at least be a co-author of 2 Eye Bee Em geek books, so I guess I am not doing so badly at my new profession either. But it doesn’t inspire or satisfy me in the same way I am by photography.

I miss the freedom and creativity of being paid to take pictures. I just don’t miss the poverty and uncertainty of where the next paycheck will come from. And there’s the rub. I have gotten used to money now, accustomed to being able to pay my bills on time and accustomed to a house with spare rooms, and with room for my (2) dogs and cats. So perhaps, the capitalists have in the end bought me off. We’ll see. Life’s not over just yet.


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